How to Properly Complain without Offending Everyone?

If we look the internal structure of a complaint—you wouldn’t be surprised that it’s of the same pattern as a debate. It should go without saying that a debate must be attempted with an appropriate preparation—especially If you’d want to win it—so should a complaint.

Living in a capitalist society that constitutes people of varying mindsets and people who are driven by different motives—it’s inevitable that someone in our vicinity will hurt us in some way or the other. Markedly, it could be anyone; a colleague, a child, a friend or out of all, most likely—your partner.

People around us are often neglectful of something that matters excessively to us. With our definition, people surrounding us are mostly; thoughtless, brusk, offensive or unkind. We don’t often recognize our reactions to the maltreatment people throw at us. We might not agree but our reactions go right from our hearts and clearly depicts who we are. Our reactions can make a substantial difference between a life of a persistent bitterness, constant frustrations and our tolerable peaceful coexistence with so-called our ruthless society.  

An important section that contributes immensely to the art of living is sanely handling those who do us wrong and complain constructively. There are largely 3 main paths which one might opt to complain others;

1.       Shouting Panda

Here we shout, insult, belittle, explode to our extremes to crush our opponents. However, the thing that we often neglect is what lies behind these responses. It’s agitation and broadly a catastrophic feeling of betrayal and hurt. This unsettles us so much and hurts our dignity to such an extent that we find ourselves roaring our way to humiliation. But, at the same time—we also must acknowledge that Shouting Panda guarantees to prevent our complaint from ever being heard, let alone be resolved.

In our way to complain with all our rantings, we often end up offending who have offended us, which entirely dooms our original complaint against them. Here, we achieve nothing!

2.       Holding Panda

Here the victim says very little but hates very quietly and deeply. Here, one doesn’t complain directly from their disparity of ever being understood. This panda is often fueled with self-loathing and feels like he doesn’t deserve to be heard. It gets trapped in primitive self-hatred—resulting in an intense cynicism and melancholy and withdraws himself from the scene itself.

We often learn this technique of complaining in our childhood when we learn to swallow our pain and push it inside us. It often leaked with veiled aggression against those who have done us wrong.

Here too, we achieve nothing!

3.       Adult Panda

Here Panda is mature and knows what he wants to communicate. In order to master such a behavior, we should fundamentally work with a background sense that we don’t deserve meanness and also, that meanness won’t on its own ever be able to disturb us.

We mustn’t put ourselves in a complete chaos, just because someone has said something mean to us—by an insult.

Here are few things Adult Panda can teach us;

·         We should take the meanness from the world in a calm and strategic manner.

·         We must be careful to not belittle our opponents or insult.

·         We must concentrate on how we feel rather than pointing fingers at our opponents.

·         Replace – ‘You’re selfish and evil for doing this to me’ by saying – ‘I feel hurt’.

Even after all the precautions and advice from Adult Panda, we shouldn’t extend our faith to everyone that they would always understand our complaint and accept what we’re trying to convey. But, we voice our complaints anyway, because we know it’s not good to swallow our complaints. And, no one gets benefited from our silence in a long run.

By sketching an appropriate style of complaining, we can fill in our words with reasons and reflections and we can take our hesitant self on the path of Mature complaining—one step at a time.

Happy Complaining!

If you think there is a better way to express a complaint, do let us know in our comment section. We might include it in our article and help several people to improve their complaining.

Also, Check our courses by Success Guru AK Mishra and explore infinite possibilities to improve your lifestyle; Click Here  

EQUANIMOUS – What does it mean and Why it’s important?

Being successful is not a goal—it’s an everyday journey. It is said that your degree of success in life directly depends on how you use your mind and body. There are essential qualities that one should cultivate towards their body and mind. There are proper well-defined steps to be successful in the world. The two fundamental qualities are that; you must be able to harness the prowess of human mind and the human body.

Harness the Mind

To harness the human mind—the one quality that you must possess is to be Equanimous.

EQUANIMOUS

Adjective

1.       In full control of your faculties

Equanimous gives you access to different dimensions of your mind. If there is no equanimity, in a skewed sense of mind, your ability to use your mind is substantially reduced. Another major dimension is on the level of your energy, both physiologically and internally—one must be exuberant. It’s only when one energizes the exuberance within himself, he is able to have an ability to find a solution for the various complications of life.

Success will come to you much more easily, but beyond this, to be successful—one needs insight, inspiration and integrity.

Visit Art of Success to know more secrets: here

Insight: With this, you pay attention to your life around you in such a way that you get to see something that most of the people avoid in day-to-day life.

Inspiration: With this, one must be constantly inspired. It’s is important to understand why you’re doing—what you’re doing.  To look at the larger dimension of your actions and figure out the contribution that you make through your simple acts or whatever you are doing for that matter. You must acknowledge that every action that you take in your life is a contribution to some dimension in this world.  Someone or other gets affected by your actions—so the key is to be conscious of your actions and how it affects your surroundings, and that will provide us with a constant inspiration.

Integrity: Integrity is a crucial part of your success because your actions that you carry in this world exhibits an aura of trustiness around you—that you generate on the daily business. How many people you effect on the daily basis determines your daily efforts. The amount of trustiness will directly impact and enhance, simply because people pave the way for trustworthy people, rather than creating impediments.

Believe in magic and it will happen: Join Life Lovers Club

Believe something amazing is going to happen, and it will—because magic happens to only those who believe in it. 
AK Mishra's Art of Success invites all the believers to join Life Lovers Club and take a leap forward. 
Get aboard! We look forward to seeing you. 

Visit our website - http://www.artofsuccess.in/

International Day of Happiness – Do you really celebrate the Happiness?

Do you think we all should get a holiday to celebrate the day of happiness; Or should we celebrate the happiness at workplace; as our work is something which truly brings inner satisfaction, agree or not? 

Courtesy: AK Mishra Library

International Day of Happiness is observed every year on 20^th March to recognize the relevance of wellbeing and happiness. The day was founded by United Nations (UN) through adopting UN Resolution 66/281 in order to achieve two goals: 1 is to establish a set of principles for addressing the complex, interrelated challenges faced by humankind in the ultimate quest to achieve happiness and 2nd is to promote, reserve and celebrate the principles outlined in UN Resolutions 65/309 and 66/281; that happiness is a universal human right and goal.

The way we celebrate Valentine’s Day to recall the importance of love and true relationships in our lives, the day sometimes serves to remind us how much we love our partners and how much we are adored in return. similarly, the International Day of happiness must be celebrated with equal enthusiasm to recognize the significance of happiness in our lives.

What is the biggest source of happiness in your life? Relationships? Work? Innermost passion or a desire? Whatever it is, celebrate it today! If its work; if you are doing the job you always wanted; celebrate it today. If you are married to a person you always wanted to marry with, celebrate it! If you still managed to keep your passion alive while struggling with every day hectic schedule; celebrate it today! Life gives us a lot every day to celebrate; it’s we who often forget to notice as we are so busy in paying attention to the things we do not have in life.

This is the idea behind the international Day of Happiness; a great day to shift our focus on Happiness; especially when the world is too busy in paying attention to the negativities or the wrong things happening in people’s personal lives; today, think about the positive things you have in your life.

When we have beautiful relationships, we often desire to have more materialistic satisfaction, and the people who are financially strong, often miss the beautiful relations in life; this is because we do not acknowledge the things we have and end up rushing behind other things in life.

Therefore, not today; just for the sake of celebration, but every day, acknowledge the things you have; feel the happiness that can be brought to you by small moments, some people or few achievements in life. The relationships, the wonderful caring mother, a supportive father, crazy siblings, friends, a great career, celebrate even the struggle; because that really brings out your true personality; celebrate each and every moment; celebrate this happiness you have in life. Wish you all a very Happy International Day of Happiness

If you think you are going nowhere in life, hold on. Read this!

In today’s era of hectic schedules and fast-paced world, we all are in hurry to win the race. The race to complete the tasks, the race to get most effective and productive at the workplace, the race to prove yourself the best, but while running in this race, we often encounter a question in mind; where are we exactly heading towards? Are we going in the right direction? We often get disappointed when things don’t occur the way we expected. We are running in the race with a constant fear of left behind.

This is an era when 15 years old kids are developing codes, making websites and changing the overall definition of success. Some people at the age of 25 are running their own organizations or have become accomplished artists and traveling the world.

If at the age of 30, you are still drudging in 9 to 6 job, these questions must be popping up in your mind; what am I doing? Where have I reached? Am I even closer to this race? Is this what I wanted in my life?

Most of your friends are working in big MNCs with high profiles, updating their pictures on social networking sites, most of your friends are getting married and posting pictures of their honeymoon to Switzerland or some other exotic locations, which you cannot even think in the next 2 to 3 years.

Relax! Take a deep breath. Stop comparing yourself with others. Everyone is living their part; everyone is struggling with their problems and weaknesses; all you can see is what others actually choose to show you. The world is full of different kind of people; some get successful early in life; while some do wonders at the later part of life. Some get married at 25, while some get the love of their life at the age of 40. Some drop out the college and become an entrepreneur at the age of 35; while some after completing their MBA wait for 5 years to secure a good job.

Henry Ford designed his revolutionary Model T car at the age of 45, you never know what you’ll be doing at this age; may be something better than this. Always remember this wonderful fact; “You are uniquely, lovingly positioned on this earth by masters craftsman, don’t compare yourself to others.

There is a right time for everything to happen, and everyone is working on the basis of their Time Zone. You friends, your colleagues, your cousins, your siblings; some might seem going ahead of you while some may seem behind you. But all are working their own race, on their own lane in their own time. There is a different master plan for all created by the almighty. Let this plan work out the way it is, and stop comparing your plan and time with others. Everything happens for a reason. Where Obama took retirement at the age of 55, trump took the ownership at 70; they are in their own time zone and you are in yours.

Happiness cannot be achieved by achieving success at young age, or getting married or travelling the world; the true happiness is achieved when you start considering yourself unique, when you know your worth which cannot be compared with any other person in the world; when you feel satisfied with what you have and work to achieve what you desire without cribbing anymore by looking at others’ success, when you consider others’ success as an inspiration for you and when you begin competing not with others but with your own self.

Maybe the job you have lost wasn’t right for you; as you are meant to hone your skills for something great, maybe the person you are not with anymore wasn’t right for you; maybe you are meant for someone else; we get the things which are truly meant for us when we learn to accept, let go and open ourselves to receive.

When things are not going the way they should be; do not get disheartened; spend that time in polishing your personality, learning new skills and creating a better “you” for the future. You never know, you might be doing something really worthwhile in few years and you are busy today in cribbing, feeling bad and drowning your woes in alcohol. Just imagine the regret! Are you really that worthless? The answer is NO!. you can do wonders, it’s just you have to make yourself ready for the time when you’ll do wonders, so learn from your today’s mistakes, make yourself better and get ready for the future achievements.

International Women's Day 2017: Be Bold to bring a positive change

The International women’s Day is celebrated every year on 8^th March all over the world. The day is celebrated to acknowledge and give honor to all the women for their selfless love, determination and for being a beautiful essence of our lives.

Courtesy: AK Mishra Library

A woman has incredible power to create, transform and nurture. A woman is the personification of affection, love, care, sacrifice and has beautiful skills to nurture life.

Her ability to beautifully nurture life makes a woman the strongest and powerful being. She can play diverse roles with serenity, be it a supporting wife, a lovely daughter, caring mothers or an affectionate and friendly sister.

A woman has her own uniqueness and is nowhere less than any other man in the world. Gender is a western concept. India is said to be the original home of Mother Goddess. From Sita in Ramayan to Rani Jhansi to Kannagi in Silapathikaran are not only celebrated women but have also immensely contributed to social change and awareness.

India is fortunate to have had several great women – Annie Besant, who was the first president of Indian National Congress, Vijayalakshani Pandit, first Indian Woman President of UN General Assembly, Sarojini Naidu, Mother Teresa, Indira Gandhi, who was the 2^nd woman Prime Minister in the world, Pratibha Patil, first women president of India, Kalpana Chawla, and many more Indian women in corporate sector who have proved to be more than a match. Their wonderful contribution to society in whole is priceless.  While acknowledging wonderful woman of the world, how can we miss to recall the incredible strength of Neerja, a 23-year-old flight attendant who lost her life while saving hundreds of lives in an airplane hijack.

Women should be respected and have complete rights in the society to live the life of their choice, to wear the clothes of their choice.  The people who look at them with bad intentions got to change their perceptions and mindsets. All the men and women must take a stand to stop all kinds of violence against women. Let's bring a positive change in the society and make this beautiful world the safest place for all the women to live the life of their choice. 

On this wonderful Day, AK Mishra’s Art of Success wishes all the woman of the world a Very Happy Women’s Day! And to all the men of the world, you guys are incredible too who work harder to fulfill all the wishes of your wife, to make your mother’s dreams come true, to let your sisters never face any hard times, and to give all love and affection to your daughters. 

We have the power to create change and make the world a better place as women; no matter how these bunch of criminals try to keep them under fear. Women and men must stand together against rape, domestic violence, slavery etc. It is up to all of us to remember and act because the worst crime would be to forget. 

How not to care what anyone thinks of you?

Courtesy: AK Mishra Library

One of our most prominent fears which haunt us when we socialize in this world and mingle with others—is that we may in our hearts be not interesting, rather boring. But the good news and fundamental truth too is that no one is ever truly boring. They are only in danger of coming across as such when they either fail to understand their deeper selves or don’t dare or know how to communicate with others.

There is simply no such thing as an inherently boring person or thing—is one of the great lessons of art. Many of the most satisfying artworks don’t feature rare elements, they are evidently about the ordinary, looked from a special perspective, with unusual sincerity and openness to varnished experience.

For example—look at the painting of Whistler’s Mother by James McNeill. It’s a simple depiction of artist’s mother sitting on a wooden chair against a gray wall. Outwardly the scene in the painting is utterly simple and could initially appear to be deeply unpromising material for a painting. Yet, like any great artist, McNeill knew how to interrogate his own perceptions—in a fresh, clear, underivative manner and translated them accurately into his medium—knitting a small masterpiece out of the thread of everyday life. And just as there’s no such thing as a boring everyday life, so too there could be no such thing as an innately boring person.

Humans witnessed in its essence with honesty and without artifice is always interesting.

When we call a person boring—we’re just pointing to someone who doesn’t have the courage for concentration to tell us what it’s like to be them. By contrast, we invariably prove compelling when we succeed in saying how and what we truly desire, envy, regret mourn or dream. In a simpler form if anyone recuperates the real data on what it’s like to exist is guaranteed to have material with which one can captivate others.

An interesting person isn’t always someone with whom obviously and outwardly interesting things have happened: like someone who travelled the world or met importance dignitaries, nor someone who talks about the weighty themes of culture, history or science. On the contrast, an interesting person is someone who can give us faithful accounts, drama, and strangeness of being alive.

Then, what are some of the elements that get in the way of is being as interesting as we in fact are;

Our Loss of Faith

We feel boring and exhibit the same feeling when there is a lack of faith. We often believe that it really could be feelings that would stand the best chance of interesting others. When we tell an anecdote, we majorly concentrate on giving the outward details—like about the weather, people who were involved, what time was it—rather than maintaining courage to report the layer of feelings, beneath the surface—the intricate facts which flashes the moment of guilt, the sudden sexual attraction, the humiliating sulk, that strange euphoria at the middle of the night, every small detail. We should acknowledge that our neglect is not just an oversight, but it could be a deliberate strategy to mold our ideas of dignity and normality. We lack the nerve to look more closely within.

For say, most five-years-old are far less boring than most 45-years old. What’s interesting is that kids don’t necessarily have exciting feelings, far from it, but their sheer frankness and uncensored version of their feelings are what makes their insights interesting.

Our inner-struggle to appear normal

We all feel boring not by our nature—so much as by a fateful will that begins its effect in teenage years to appear normal, even when we’re honest about our feelings. We may still prove boring because we don’t know them as well as we should, so we get stuck at the level of insisting on an emotion rather than explaining it. Any situation is extremely exciting, awful or beautiful, but not to be able to provide those around us with any of the sorts of related details and examples that would help them understand why. We can end up boring not so much because we don’t want to share our lives, as because we don’t yet know them well enough to do so.

Luckily, the gift of being interesting is not an exceptional talent. It requires only direction, honesty and focus. The person we call fascinating is someone alive to what we all deeply want from social intercourses, which is an uncensored glimpse of what the brief waking dream called life feels like.  Through the eyes of another person and reassurance, we are not entirely alone with all that feels most puzzling, strange and strong within us.

A training on Take Charge of life held at LG by AK Mishra Art of Success

AK Mishra’s Art of Success organized Life Transformational Training on “Take Charge of Life” at LG on 1st March 2017. The training session began at 11am and stretched till 5pm on the request of the zonal trainers of LG who were the primary audience of the session.

As the topic suggests "Take Charge of Life" the session aimed at helping the attendees realize that most of their decisions and actions in life are based on their surroundings rather their own willingness. Hence, everyone must strive to optimize their life and bring a change that matters.

The session commenced with an introduction of Success Guru AK Mishra followed by his own journey to success. Mr. AK Mishra said, that nothing in life is impossible to achieve, be it; success, wealth, healthy relationships or a right balance in life. 

The discourse also included the 5 pillars of life; Success, Happiness, Peace, Appreciation and humanity which can be accomplished through a well-composed approach towards development of mind, body and emotions. In this interactive session by Mr. AK Mishra, he encouraged the attendees to break the mediocrity of life and grasp the opportunity to transform each day to revive their souls and rejuvenate their minds. Attendees actively participated in the session and the training session acted as a stress buster for them.

“One must pursue his passion, whether it’s music, dance, writing or just sheer excelling in their lives. People often delay and become a victim of repetitive syndrome and get trapped in the mediocrity of life”—He said. 

When interacted with Mr. AK Mishra, he said – “The growing complexity and obscurity of modern corporate life is putting tremendous pressure on human mind and soul. People struggle to achieve a sane balance between their personal and professional lives and are trapped between their ‘want’ and their ‘can’. And therefore, my trainings aim at encouraging the people to break out this monotony and experience the life beyond the self-made conventional boundaries”. My aim is to encourage participants to introspect, and realize what they are losing while running behind in the race of the day to day competitions". 

Is it Necessary to Stamp out Materialistic Desires to be Happy?

What exactly is the meaning of happiness and how to get it - this simple question has been perplexing even most intelligent beings since ages.  A person can marvel at the ways people adopt to stay happy. Some of us believe buying trendiest clothes, coolest gadgets, and better things can make us happy while others opine possession of worldly things is the root cause of all our problems and we ought to stop accumulation. This is how we can connect to the god and master the hardships thrown to us by nature.

On the surface, all of us look happy or pretend to be happy but deep down there is a feeling of void and we all diligently are in search of something that can fill in this void so that we could have peace, contentment, and happiness. Those of us, who count on materialistic approach and see worldly comforts as the substitute of happiness, often have to flip out for worldly comforts, are transient in nature and nothing but the transformation of worldly sorrows. So, to run only for material comforts in order to gain happiness does not seem to be the legitimate solution. On the other hand, if we detach our self from the worldly obligations, the growth of our society, as well as civilization, will be imperiled and if this is what god had expected from us, he would have not created the world.

So both the theories propounded to stay happy seem to be flawed and wide of the mark. It’s not possible to lead a life without using whatever that belongs to this world; likewise, complete detachment from the world is a potent threat to the development of healthy society. But we need not go berserk as we can always choose the middle way to attain a right balance in life.  We can enjoy all the amenities that world has to offer while being humble, honest, truthful and above all thankful to God. We also have to be vigilant enough to make sure that we don’t exploit nature and natural resources in order to enrich our lives.  We must also not have clandestine agenda for development; all our operations must be aboveboard. We don't need to detach from the world but moderate our actions and revive the swept away values. With insightful talk sessions by Success Guru AK Mishra and the meditation techniques, AK Mishra’s Art of Success training aims to help people connect with their higher self and learn the art of achieving peace, contentment, and success in life.

4 Key Truths About Changing Your Life

Entrepreneurs are often considered larger than life. We are known to take big risks and navigate seemingly insurmountable odds. For many it’s a mindset and lifestyle that seems out of reach.

The truth is, we can all tap into these traits and discover our true potential. This becomes an important task when we feel stuck, like a hampster on the proverbial wheel, in a monotonous, unfocused and unfulfilled life.

Nothing changes until we change. We have to take a risk.

Here’s a look at four key principles you can use to start creating change in your life

Courtesy: AK Mishra Library

.

1. Break your routine

For many of us, life is repetitive. Every day we go home, have dinner, talk to our family members and fall sleep with very little variation. Break the dull routine and add some leisure activities to the mix. Plan a family trip and come back home with a renewed zest for life.

We all know how important it is to try new things. We’re told to look at the world with a fresh perspective, but we often fail to live that way. Hence, it’s necessary to remind ourselves that challenges help us grow. And without risk, we can never know what we are truly capable of.

A routine gives us structure; but it begs the question: Is your routine actually working (i.e. producing desired results)? As Dan Cumberland, author of The Meaning Manifesto suggests, “Sometimes breaking your routine is really important. Sometimes life, energy, and creativity are found outside of your usual routine.”

2. Choose your own path daily

Your life is your own project. You have to nurture and fight for it daily.

It’s important to expand our thinking capacity. Explore beyond boundaries and conventional beliefs that insist there’s only one way to do something. Some rules are meant to be broken.

It may seem easy to follow someone else’s script for your life, but the results can be devastating. 
People that we care about will always have their opinions; consider them wisely. A the end of the day choose your own path.

3. Experiment with your life

Risk-taking is a common trait among entrepreneurs. Fear of failure doesn’t hold them back. They know that if they take risks and fail, they will be glad that they tried something new.

When we take on new challenges we always have the opportunity to learn. Much of that learning is continued through iteration and experimentation as we find better ways to accomplish our goals the next time. This same mindset can be applied to life.

Ask yourself, “What is holding me back?” Is it your fear of failure or your ego? Maybe you’re afraid of what someone might say? Do you think it’s too late to try something new at this juncture in your life?

Trying something new doesn’t mean you have to flip your life upside down. Start with small changes every day. Experiment with your life.

4. Never overlook the power of little things

Little things that we change can break the monotony of life and help us regain our personal power. Try a new restaurant, take your spouse for a night out on the town, go to an unfamiliar place with friends, try a new hobby, do something kind and unexpected for your parents.

Discover yourself and empower others by paying attention to the little things. Break at least one conventional rule every day and see what happens.

The vastness of LOVE

Whenever we hear the word “LOVE”, the first thing that comes into our head is romantic love, marriage or couple. Even when we google this word, we find thousands of quotes, articles, poems or stories, but none of them talk about the vastness of this word “love”. The love is vast as the ocean; love is the most beautiful emotion which not only enriches our inner soul but also makes people around us feel wanted and adored.

Courtesy: AK Mishra Library

Love is when you understand and admire your parents’ efforts to keep you safe from all troubles, love is when you fight with your siblings but stand by them in all the tough moments, love is when you fight with the world to keep your true friendship alive forever and love is when you choose a person to spend your entire life with. The emotion called love is taught to us by our parents when they lovingly hold us in their arms when we enter in this world. They bring a sense of self-love in us by admiring us the most with those teary eyes.  And the journey of love starts with the self-love which we develop inside.

When we accept ourselves for what we are, we effortlessly love and admire the people around us.

The love is a beautiful emotion which cannot be categorized the way we have been categorizing it until now. On this Valentine’s Day, spread love everywhere and help people understand that love is beyond just the romantic relationships. Thank all the people you have in your life and on this day of love, let your heart be filled with joy, positivity, and love; let the people feel how special they are because they are the ones who indeed make your life complete. Valentine’s Day is celebrated to help people recall that we are nothing without the people we have in our life who love us, who admire us, who accept us and who encourage us. Revive that sense of love for self in you and make your loved ones feel how special they are. Just make a genuine list of people whom you truly consider your loved ones. Let’s transform the meaning of Valentine’s Day by breaking those limited beliefs we have been carrying till now for Valentine’s Day. Wish you all Happy Valentine’s Day.

3 STEPS TO ANGER MANAGEMENT

In all our lives, in a way that’s strange to us; untold, unspecified, secret, mysterious, and dark, hidden, concealed – we are angry at each other. We certainly don’t think an angry man as an optimist, but below the scrub surface – they essentially are, at the cost of being misjudged.

Let’s take an example of Sanjay – He has an8-year-old kid and he has often told his kid to not interrupt him while he is watching his cricket match. For some very good reason, he finds this prohibition annoying. After a long wait, his kid frankly decides to ask when will he be free to play with him?

Now – Sanjay is shouting – because deep inside, beneath all the anger and the disappointment from his kid and life – he’s very hopeful. The problem is, despite all the evidence Sanjay keeps encountering in his life – he devotedly has a faith in a world where his kid understands him, obeys him. The deeper problem is that all these memories of disappointments go back to his childhood – decades in past – where his hopefulness of an ideal world is still not dampened. And he shouts – screams, explode at the world around him.

The ultimate truth is that Sanjay will never be able to remove the frustrations of his life, but Sanjay could, perhaps, if he is wise – learn to change what frustration mean to him. He might learn to accept the darker side of the truth behind reality, that human life is essentially full of sadness, that existence as a human being is not entirely a happy process.

But how should Sanjay do that?

Here are 3 steps for his anger Management and for all of you who get furious at times.

1.       Face the truth

It’s highly advisable to face the truth and be aware of emotions. Your emotional state in anger is a boat which is flooding with water, and if you’d not care about plugging the leak, or remove what’s making that hole – no matter what you do to hold it – your boat will eventually sink. Your negative state cannot be brought down by anyone around you – there is only one who can change it – and that is you!

2.      Embrace the truth

You should embrace the feeling by internally thinking the other person in your shoes and try to figure out what is the triggering element of his emotional bombardment. At the core, most people have the expectation dilemma and do not want to disappoint one another – especially the one they truly love.

We seldom imagine what the others have done that triggered your bad side, understand what they might be going through while carrying their huge pile of emotions. You should acknowledge that’s it’s not about you – it’s about them – and their internal pain.

You always have a choice to diffuse their power by accepting them as a part of you and thank them for helping you surface deep-rooted feelings.

3.       Erase the truth

After you have faced and embraced the truth and the feelings surrounding it, you can lay the rest down. You should understand – the negative reactions will lead to negative energy – and turning a blind eye towards this negativity is telling yourself that you are not worthy.

We should embrace the fact that keeping the focus on you means loving yourself and at the same time, acknowledge that no one is perfect.

There is an immense joy in understanding that everyone around you is doing their best and is on, as per their psyche, their best behavior. And most importantly, love yourself for everything you do right and wrong – because at the end – that is what makes you – YOU

Effective methods to boost your confidence

Since no human being is immune to the feelings of insecurity and self-doubt, it sometimes, become hard to overcome. Also, undoubtedly, everyone at some point or the other, struggles with issues of self-esteem. This could be situational, for example some find themselves insecure and less confident while socializing with new or unknown people, or during public speaking, but could be very confident around the people they know. Some introverted people often feel shy or less confident while partying, dancing or singing, while some may feel lesser confident trying something new at their workplace. But you can certainly give yourself a quick boost in such situations. Thus, here are some simple confidence boosting techniques to follow.

Courtesy: AK Mishra Library

Smile More Often

Your physiology greatly influences your self-awareness and emotions. Moreover, it is a scientifically proven fact that smiling not only makes you more attractive, but also enhances your mood, lowers blood pressure, relieves stress and helps you stay positive. Hence, begin your day with a smile; look at yourself in the mirror with a smiling face and make an effort to smile more often, throughout the day, while talking to other people or greeting others.

Meditate Regularly

Pick a good Buddhist mindfulness guided meditation and try it every day for 10 minutes. It will help improve self-awareness and will drastically enhance your confidence level.

Improve Your Posture

Improve your sitting and standing posture. Research shows that those who sit straight are more likely to generate ideas and believe in their own thoughts, as compared to those who sit hunched over their desk throughout the day. Moreover, standing straight also not only makes you feel and look confident, but also significantly improves your productivity level. When you have an impending socially evaluative situation such as an interview or public speaking engagement, practice and improvise your posture a day before D-day.

Stand straight in a power pose and then after some time, observe which posture makes you feel confident and comfortable while standing straight. The power pose will help raise your level of testosterone (the hormone of dominance) and lower your stress hormone (cortisol) while also making you feel more confident.

Visualize Your Success

By visualizing your success, whether acing an interview or finishing a task or a workout, you can indeed take yourself a step ahead towards your desired success. Although many spiritual leaders have already accepted it as a well-known fact, it has also been scientifically proven that imaging an activity, stimulates the nervous system and activates several same neural pathways in the brain, as you would actually experience in an activity.

Thus, by visualizing yourself overcoming challenges, you can certainly help yourself be more confident and comfortable while dealing with the current challenges which will seem familiar.

Embrace Your Feelings of Low Self-Esteem

Once you are done with developing a habit of visualization, meditation and corrected posture, your next step should be to take the time to embrace your feeling of low self-esteem. Yes, you read it right, embrace your low self-esteem!

Moments of doubts, situations where you encounter low self-esteem, feeling of unhappiness, discontentment are pretty important and required as they are imperative poisons that compel you to eliminate what you do not like and to bring a positive change in yourself. By suppressing your negative self, you’ll end up always moving a step away from your improvement and perfection. So, begin by recognizing your insecurities and instead of improving your feelings of low self-esteem, start improvising your competence. Make yourself abler, learn what causes low self-esteem, where you lack and improve those abilities. You’ll gradually enhance your confidence levels too.

Embrace Your Failures

After learning the skills of accepting your weaknesses that cause self- doubts, re-evaluate how you consider your failures. Failures come as challenges in your life to make you what you truly are and to bring out your true potential, to make you more patient, more experienced, more mature, wiser, more humble, more resilient, more creative and more grounded. It also teaches you a lot about your true self. When you focus on learning, you gain from each of your failures, you take another step towards your desired success and failures become just a part of your journey to your phenomenal triumph.

Improve Your Surroundings

Last but not the least, to improve your confidence levels, expand your social circle. A supportive social circle will always encourage you to move forward and this encouragement truly plays a very vital role in boosting your confidence levels and for you to reach your goal. Thus, keep a distance from those who discourage you for your dreams and spend more time with the people who believe in you.

Understanding Love Relationships

Love is an emotion of enormous power. All long-term relationships go through a variety of phases.  If the relationship continues, it settles into a more stable time of building a history as a couple. If children or teenagers enter into the picture, that is entirely a new phase. Later, there is another phase of being together as a mature couple with the wisdom of experience.

People say Love and relationships in present age do not have that passion like old days. But were the relationships in old times really perfect? The truth is there was a perception set in everyone’s mind that relationships should last forever, at least once we're married to someone, the societal obscurity that we have to be with that person, no matter whether we are happy or not, but just because we have circumscribed with the vows of marriage. Although we are not too different from those people who lived centuries ago, our core desires are still the same. But we have become practical in our lives.Imagine being in love, maybe you have been in love or you hope to be in love. We figure out things quickly, we make quick decisions, a number of emotions rush together so quickly, but then what happens? 50% of marriages get failed? Why? Have you ever tried to discover the answer? 

Sometimes, two people come out to be completely different, maybe the female could be goal oriented but fallen in love with the guy who wants his girl or wife to not to work, or go for some other job or any other similar thought. The moment when love rules our mind, we don’t let our brain function, and we just flow with the storm of emotions. We agree to such mundane things, the kind of behavior we don't expect from ourselves. We get ready to sacrifice, sacrifice our ambitions, our dreams, our actual self, but the truth is one can never change his true personality, and hence it results in divorce, break-ups, and range of relationship problems.

We have the prefrontal cortex brain which takes rational decisions, located near the front head, is involved in decision making in response to emotions. The prefrontal cortex controls what decision a person makes when faced with an emotional reaction. The same part of the brain controls addictions and the feeling of love. But what happens our feeling of being in love gets too strong which starts controlling even our brain and mind, and we become unable to take rational decisions in love matters and accept even the wrong. And this is what happens when we realize, that the person in front of us is not the right, and we should stop here or should contemplate the situation, but suddenly the other part of the brain which is controlled by the feeling of love suddenly comes and tell the brain to knock it off, we don’t let the prefrontal cortex brain control our heart -- let alone the feeling of love.

The most important thing one needs to understand is, never fall in love, and always rise in love. Let the person accept you as you are. Love is supporting each other, fight for each other’s dreams to make them true. Remember, attachments are always against love. As long as you are attached to someone or have a fear of losing someone, you can never reach to the unconditional boundaries of love. The key to a properly functioning love and a lasting relationship is trust. It does not require rituals to follow or get circumscribed with vows of marriage or rituals which bounds you to be with the person and not to exit the doors even when two are not happy together. 

Love is about two people committing themselves to the fullest.  Often people are so lost in their search for the custom or traditional love they believe in, that they forget commitment and love are truly important to make things work. The dream of the perfection which exists in the mind of people keeps them away from the reality. One must understand the perfection comes with the true understanding of unconditional love. 

So now, do you understand love? 

5 MORNING ROUTINES TO WIN THE DAY

Tim Ferris, author of ‘the 4-hour Workweek’, has his 5 favorite morning hacks to maximize his productivity. As per Tim, positive momentum and a distraction-less start of your day don't come naturally, rather it’s manually earned every day by following a strict routine. After Interviewing hundreds of ultra-successful people, from the famous chess prodigies to athletes to billionaires – he has picked the common denominator out of all and made a list of his top 5 routines.

Out of his top five routines, he claims that even if he gets to three routines per morning – he wins. And as the famous saying goes, “if you win the morning, you win the day”.

Tim Ferris is an efficient all-rounder – he fluently speaks 5 languages, is a national Chinese kickboxing champion, holds a world record in Tango and is a best-selling author. That’s a big list for a single man – and getting demotivated from a long list of someone else’s achievement is not the point. Rather, it is a proof that the only thing that’s stopping us from succeeding in any field is our mental limitations, and Tim has a way out.

There is a lot we can learn from Tim, and his belief that single individual can achieve greatness, and with a right set of mind – can reach the pinnacle of his field. So, let’s get started.

Top 5 Morning routines

5. Make your bed

It might sound like an unimportant ritual, but it gives one a sense of control at the very beginning of the day. It’s a form of strategy that helps you to deal the intangibles and curveballs that life throws at you. No matter how complex your day is planned ahead – you can always make your bed and straighten at least one thing.

4. Meditate

He states, ‘more than 80% of the world class performers I’ve interviewed practice one form or the other of mindfulness’. As per Tim, there are few who go to Headspace, few who opt for guided meditation, and others who stick to traditional meditation techniques.   

3. Do Pushups

Tim says, doing any kind of physical exercise first thing in the morning helps you to stay prime, and wake your complete body at a go. He prefers to do the pushups, but he recommends any kind of exercise – sit-ups, lunges, and squats. Doing so quiets ones’ mental chatter and effects the mood dramatically.  

2.  Hydrate yourself

You need to water yourself and take out the dryness of the entire last night. He recommends titanium tea which is one teaspoon of turmeric, some ginger shaving and a teaspoon each of black tea and dragon tea. He recommends it for excellent cognition and weight loss. He personally prefers it with a glass of cold water, but even warm water would do the same trick.   

1. Write a Journal

The most important trick in his list is to write a journal for whatever is going in your head. You can plan your day or prioritize things or just express gratitude for the various labels in your life. When Tim writes his journal, he broadly considers four categories; opportunity for the day, some small goals, yesterday’s achievements and relationships.  

Are you jealous of other’s success?

How do you feel when your best friend bags a promotion, or for that matter, if he gets into a happy relationship? Don’t you often brush off these type of news with a shallow statement – perhaps saying – ‘it’s never going to last’.

We all acknowledge that jealousy at its core is a form of protective shield. It exists to give us a defense mechanism against all types of the successes of other people – that might, in various cases, demoralize us. We often mourn to our peer’s victory, often refuse them with a superficial tag, protecting our ego, screaming;’ I am a much better person than everyone else’. We don’t necessarily put that out loud – but most of us religiously believe in that statement.  We believe that our adversity is this temporary phase which will vanish as soon we want them to vanish. We all with our inner beings agree – that we’re and everything about us – is in control.

According to one study – it’s hard not to hate people around us – especially people that we grew up with; our friends, siblings, co-workers, spouse – merely to be just okay with this socially ranking based society. Certainly, this comparison trap swallows us – changes our perception and judgments. While jealousy is a natural response to so many adversities of life – it’s not necessarily beneficial and healthy.

Courtesy: AK Mishra Library

Don’t mix exteriors to interiors

In this social networking world, it’s easier than ever before to fall for complaints. In our terrible lives, we often complain about how other’s success looks completely unachievable. We always try to believe we’re fixed beings and there are differences that we often get confused about – but the evident truth is we’re a constantly changing species and we evolve every day with our every new experience.

We often ignore people’s journey to their success and regard it as pure dumb luck, effortless or unearned. We often fall prey to over-simplification and reactive thinking, for a simple reason because it’s easier to pass comments than to ask tougher questions to ourselves; How does their success relate to my own values?, or What do I admire about their story?, or What have they done to get that? When we introspect and try to answer these questions – we reflect, and immediately come out of the comparing trap and turn inwards to face our own desires and fears.

It’s not a secret that envy and admiration are the reactions to what we value the most. If we somehow align ourselves with what we value – we’re much inclined to a richly satisfying life. We should use other’s success as a mirror to our life – and that’s a critical key to most of our life’s hardships.

How to minimize your jealousy?

Avoid comparisons

Acknowledge that everyone around you is on a different track of life and all of them have their own set of weaknesses and strengths. We should also accept that these things that limit us don’t completely define us. 

Accept

We should all admit jealousy as our natural reaction to other’s success. We should be completely honest and put aside our bruised ego whenever we face things we wish we could do. And most importantly, we should accept ourselves completely to recognize our true potential and uniqueness we are endowed with.

Reframe Jealousy into Inspiration

The same emotion that fuels jealousy can be used for motivations and inspirations to accomplish something for you. Instead of downplaying other successes, you should ask yourself if you aren’t capable of what someone else has done already. You should think, more usual than often – If they can do – I can do it too.

Compliment

Make it a habit of complimenting people on their achievements. Celebrate all the success stories and rather to resent on what did not work for you – celebrate the possibility of it. It’s a lot lesser stressful and at the same time – healthier.

Reflect on your jealousy pattern

Learn how to figure out a pattern of the areas around which you find your jealousy, and those would be the valuable signs of your life to show where in life you need to put more focus in. 

Do you think your jealousy is holding you back from tapping your full potential? Comment below to let us know about your concerns and we’d help you to handle it progressively.